Abu Gonzales Is Gone

Here's the first paragraph of the AP story on Alberto Gonzales' resignation:

WASHINGTON - Alberto Gonzales, the nation's first Hispanic attorney general, announced his resignation Monday, driven from office after a wrenching standoff with congressional critics over his honesty and competence.

Why did they have to mention that he was "the nation's first Hispanic attorney general?" If Abu's entire contribution to history is that he was the first Hispanic attorney general, that's not much to show for all the opportunities he was given.





Unfortunately, history will probably not be that kind to him. Let me suggest several other formulations that would be just as accurate:

• "the most incompetent attorney general in the nation's history"


• "the only attorney general to ever put forth a so-called rationale for condoning torture"


• "whose memory was like a sieve"


• "as-yet-unindicted for his assault upon then-Attorney General John Ashcroft while Ashcroft was in a near-coma"


• "after completing losing the respect of the 100,000 Justice Department employees, the Congress, the media and the American people"

Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out, Al.